Why Stress Isn’t Always a Bad Thing…

Why Stress Isn’t Always a Bad Thing – And How to Tap Into a Flow State

Your brain releases a large number of hormones and neurotransmitters in response to your cognition. When you are in danger, this leads to the release of dopamine, adrenaline and serotonin to help make you more alert, stronger and faster.

This is the fight or flight response and it’s you at your most powerful.

The problem is that many of us are stressed a lot of the time now and we don’t know how to turn off that fight or flight response. Thus we try to eliminate stress and think we would be a lot happier if we could.

But the reality is that stress isn’t a ‘bad thing’. Rather, stress is a valuable tool that we should tap into when necessary. The key is not to eliminate stress but rather to control it. In this post, we will look at some ways you can do that.

What is a Flow State?

A great example of stress as a positive thing is the flow state. Flow states are states of heightened concentration, increased focus and lightning reflexes. Often they are engaged when we partake in extreme sports, or when we’re completely focused on our work or a conversation.

But essentially, the neurotransmitters associated with flow states are very similar to those associated with stress. The only real difference is that you are producing more anandamide (the ‘bliss’ hormone) and more serotonin. In other words, the only real difference is that you are enjoying the experience rather than being afraid of it.

So if you can tap into that when you’re next stressed, then in theory you can experience those same heightened reflexes and attention whenever you need them.

The key is simply to try and see the stressful situation not as something scary but rather as an opportunity to learn and to develop yourself further. View it as a challenge and your body will adapt accordingly.

Another example of ‘positive stress’ is what’s known as eustress.

Eustress is the type of stress that motivates us to do things when we need to. For example, eustress is the type of stress you experience when you have an exam coming up. This may not feel very nice – but that stress is actually what stops you from spending all day sleeping and motivates you to get up and revise. Studies show that people with no stress response don’t succeed as well in life and end up letting their talents go to waste.
This is something to note next time you need a kick up the rear – just remind yourself why what you’re doing is important and why you need to focus on it. If you can do this, then you can tap into the positive power of stress and stop seeing it as your enemy.

The rest of the time? Just try to distance yourself from that stress response and tell your body ‘thanks but no thanks’. If you remind yourself why you don’t need to be stressed, often this is enough to do it!

Starting Over


Starting over became the foundation on which I built my life
~J.K Rowlings


Let’s go back to child hood for a moment. Imagine this: You’re nine years old, sitting at the table completing your homework. You’ve rushed through it, your work is sloppy and you know that you’re going to be told to re-write it. So, what do you do? You rip that page out and START OVER.


Now, apply this to your life in this waking moment. You may be in a place where you’re…well…just not feeling it. Things seem to go wrong. You’re tired of being tired. You hate your job. Your relationships aren’t flowing the way that you would like. Ultimately, you are searching for your happiness and desire ways to Heal YOU! The most amazing thing is, you can START OVER.


Okay, whine a little. Find every complaint that you can muster up and Get. It. Out! Yes, starting over takes some diligence but you can turn your life around in an instance all while enjoying your life journey. 


Here are 4 Tips to help you with Starting Over…In Life!


1. Determine Who You Want To Be: This is the time to dig deep down and ask yourself, “Who do I want to be?” While asking yourself this question, keep in mind that there is no one judging you and there are no barriers keeping you from being honest with yourself. It’s okay to be true in your answer and to not flee from your purest thought. Once you have answered this question, hold on to your answer and FANTASIZE. Fantasize everyday about who you are determined to become. You will notice that you will be driven to think positive thoughts and make small changes, each day, helping you to become your ideal self.


2. Take Care of Your Body and Mind: Your mind feeds your body and your body returns it to your mind. Your mind and body are connected, forming the behaviors in which you perform. Be mindful of the content you consume on a daily basis and make healthier choices. Spend time reading, listening to, and watching positive messages. When you do this, you may find that you are even making healthier choices on how you nourish your body. You might find yourself drinking tea, instead of soda, and you may even find yourself on a workout regimen. Both are recommended. Ultimately, be kind to both your mind and body as these are the two that make up the vessel in which you live!


3. Think Proactively: Thinking proactively simply means to think forward. Everything that has happened before this present moment is the past. Even the last sentence you read! If you want to be healthy, happy, and in love, it would not be fair to you to believe that you must dwell on past hurt, mistakes, and hardships. Those are all of the past. A way to think about it: You are only at this moment because you’ve gotten through the past. Keep taking steps forward, thinking forward, and being proactive in all that you do.


4. Just Do It: Simple! There is no better time, than NOW to start over in life. You do not have to wait for a certain day or time. You can start making changes in this moment. Your moment to start over, in life, is right here and it starts with you!

3 Need-To-Knows About Validating Yourself

“Validate yourself. With yourself. For yourself. By yourself.” ~Unknown


I thought of this theory…hypothesis, rather. What if (external) validation is nothing more than:

Validating your Awareness of Living in Denial And Thinking Internal, Ongoing, Negative thoughts?

Simply, I believe that external validation is a way to continuously deny yourself happiness, and give into negative thoughts. I also believe that we are very aware of our yearning for external validation.

External Validation vs. Positive Attention

You may ask, “well isn’t this healthy? External Validation…because then that means there is positive attention?” The answer may be no. External validation is very different from positive attention. External Validation is when you are seeking the approval of others in order to be happy and positive attention is a praise for something that you already know you’ve done well. For instance: If you write a poem and then ask someone “is it okay?” That’s seeking external validation. If you write a poem, knowing it’s great and someone TELLS you that it’s great…that’s positive attention. With positive attention, external validation will not hold precedence over how you feel about YOU, your talents, and your decisions.

Why internal validation?

While it does feel rather amazing to receive external validation, internal validation is actually your healing MEDICATION. Internal validation allows you to accept YOU just as you are without needing much approval and it helps you to stop over-judging yourself!


Of course there are some tips to help guide you towards learning to validate yourself:

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